August 11th, 2009

RIP Stephen Hawking. I bet you didn't know you were dead, either.

Stephen Hawking is dead. He was killed by England's government healthcare system. He was old, he was crippled. He was not worth keeping alive. So they just killed him.

His death came as a surprise to me. But it must have come as a huge surprise to Stephen Hawking. On this very day, he is over in England behaving as though he is amongst the living. Doing things like writing letters to prime ministers, lobbying for educational funding. Does he not know he was murdered by NHS?

A few days ago, I thought this would go down in history as the greatest piece ever written against reform in health care in America ("Don't believe those stories about insurers dropping coverage for people. In Nazi Germany, insurers loved the Jewish."), but I was wrong. Investors Business Daily stole the crown. Until today, I would have thought you had to be dead to not know who Stephen Hawking is, and that he is not dead. And it must be doubly embarrassing if you wrote for a newspaper and didn't realize this, since most of the better newspapers would publish this thing called an obituary when a famous person has died.

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Someone snitched!

Oh snap! Someone told them that Stephen Hawking is alive and well over in the United Kingdom. Excised from the piece was the beauty of the paragraph: "People such as scientist Stephen Hawking wouldn't have a chance in the U.K., where the National Health Service would say the life of this brilliant man, because of his physical handicaps, is essentially worthless."